Thursday, June 15, 2006
Oh crap it's been a month since i updated my blog.
Not much of a blog anymore, is it? I'm not much of a blogger anymore.
Not much... or TOO much??
YOU decide tonight, on tonight's edition of...
FREAK UP YOUR YEAR!!
-------------------
It all started when I was eating some Kentucky Fried Chicken. "Kentucky Fried Chicken" is putting it a bit too nicely, perhaps. This stuff was like Kentucky Fried Shameless Coward. Shamelessly it cowered, as aimlessly I glowered at Seamus and Howard. (Those were the names I had given to the breast and the thigh.) "Did I give you those names merely for the sake of rhyming," I asked them, "or was there a deeper significance?"
THEY GAVE NO ANSWER.
I had to keep reminding myself that they were the cowards, not I, because this was getting pretty scary. I mean, how ominous can you get, pieces of chicken? You just sit there not saying anything. And think of those capital letters I had to use to describe the scene. Creepy!
After so much fried coward, I was feeling pretty thirsty, and also abnormally brave, so I decided to take on a formidable Extra Large Iced Coffee. "Extra Large Iced Coffee" is putting it a bit too lightly, perhaps. This stuff was like Extra Large Iced Hacking Up A Lung Over There For Goodness' Sake. I threw a couple of cough drops in there to help soothe my afflicted beverage...
AND THEN IT TASTED WEIRD.
This was getting rather creepy. Not to mention rather familiar. I thought I could recall this exact pattern of paragraphs happening to me before.
BUT WHAT DID IT MEAN?
Wait, never mind. That broke the pattern.
Well, after so much iced mocha-lyptus, I had to use the restroom, naturally. "Restroom" is putting it a bit kindly, perhaps. This place was like a Never Even Lift A Finger To Help Anyone Around Here Room. I forgot what I had gone in there to do and just ended up giving the room a long lecture about "Idleness is the seed of the fruit of the plant of destruction" or something.
AND THEN MY BLADDER EXPLODED.
I feel my story should probably end here.
Not much of a blog anymore, is it? I'm not much of a blogger anymore.
Not much... or TOO much??
YOU decide tonight, on tonight's edition of...
FREAK UP YOUR YEAR!!
-------------------
It all started when I was eating some Kentucky Fried Chicken. "Kentucky Fried Chicken" is putting it a bit too nicely, perhaps. This stuff was like Kentucky Fried Shameless Coward. Shamelessly it cowered, as aimlessly I glowered at Seamus and Howard. (Those were the names I had given to the breast and the thigh.) "Did I give you those names merely for the sake of rhyming," I asked them, "or was there a deeper significance?"
THEY GAVE NO ANSWER.
I had to keep reminding myself that they were the cowards, not I, because this was getting pretty scary. I mean, how ominous can you get, pieces of chicken? You just sit there not saying anything. And think of those capital letters I had to use to describe the scene. Creepy!
After so much fried coward, I was feeling pretty thirsty, and also abnormally brave, so I decided to take on a formidable Extra Large Iced Coffee. "Extra Large Iced Coffee" is putting it a bit too lightly, perhaps. This stuff was like Extra Large Iced Hacking Up A Lung Over There For Goodness' Sake. I threw a couple of cough drops in there to help soothe my afflicted beverage...
AND THEN IT TASTED WEIRD.
This was getting rather creepy. Not to mention rather familiar. I thought I could recall this exact pattern of paragraphs happening to me before.
BUT WHAT DID IT MEAN?
Wait, never mind. That broke the pattern.
Well, after so much iced mocha-lyptus, I had to use the restroom, naturally. "Restroom" is putting it a bit kindly, perhaps. This place was like a Never Even Lift A Finger To Help Anyone Around Here Room. I forgot what I had gone in there to do and just ended up giving the room a long lecture about "Idleness is the seed of the fruit of the plant of destruction" or something.
AND THEN MY BLADDER EXPLODED.
I feel my story should probably end here.
