Tuesday, March 02, 2004
Up the freak without a paddle
(i swear, one day i'm going to run out of these 'freak' puns, and then i'll be...*insert today's title*)
Wow. Eleven comments. Pretty impressive. Granted, two of them are from me, one is a repeat ("i'm dave, and i always say the same thing say the same thing twice."), and one is a single-worder from the likes of matt, but it still makes me look and feel beautiful, like my porcupine-scented lotion from Swamp and Body Works. You will all be receiving your 9 dollars shortly, as promised.
In honor of bacon, which I recently found out is not in a commited relationship at the moment, i have composed this love poem, which may or may not be the first ever poem written in bullet format. It's going to be sweet. Rather, it is sweet, because i already wrote it and am not making it up just now to try and fulfill unreasonable promises i made while under a state of delusion a sentence or two ago. Here it is.
Oh Bacon, How I Love You, With A Love That Capitalizes Even The Smallest Of Words
a poem/grocery list by bensaki
To purchase:
-Lettuce, discreetly
-Tomato, with caution
-A loaf, well inspected
-Of mayo a jar
-Bacon, tenderly
-Vegetable chowder
-Beverages, coldly
-Bacon, with love
There. If that doesn't win me a Pulitzer, or at least something that can do an adequate Pulitzing job, then i quit.
(i swear, one day i'm going to run out of these 'freak' puns, and then i'll be...*insert today's title*)
Wow. Eleven comments. Pretty impressive. Granted, two of them are from me, one is a repeat ("i'm dave, and i always say the same thing say the same thing twice."), and one is a single-worder from the likes of matt, but it still makes me look and feel beautiful, like my porcupine-scented lotion from Swamp and Body Works. You will all be receiving your 9 dollars shortly, as promised.
In honor of bacon, which I recently found out is not in a commited relationship at the moment, i have composed this love poem, which may or may not be the first ever poem written in bullet format. It's going to be sweet. Rather, it is sweet, because i already wrote it and am not making it up just now to try and fulfill unreasonable promises i made while under a state of delusion a sentence or two ago. Here it is.
Oh Bacon, How I Love You, With A Love That Capitalizes Even The Smallest Of Words
a poem/grocery list by bensaki
To purchase:
-Lettuce, discreetly
-Tomato, with caution
-A loaf, well inspected
-Of mayo a jar
-Bacon, tenderly
-Vegetable chowder
-Beverages, coldly
-Bacon, with love
There. If that doesn't win me a Pulitzer, or at least something that can do an adequate Pulitzing job, then i quit.
