Wednesday, October 22, 2003
Gopher, Everett?
I have a confession to make. Among other tasks, i work as a milk boy in our school cafeteria. It is a shameful career, and my elderly Chinese martial arts mentor is no longer talking to me because of it. I cannot say i blame him. Anyway, the milk we use is brought to you by Land O' Lakes, a brand name that evokes, paradoxically, a land which is made of lakes. To further the unbelievability of the name, one would almost have to presume that these lakes are filled with milk; otherwise, why even bring them up? Land O' Cows would be a more fitting name, but they never asked me. And even if they did, i would never sell out my brilliant ideas to corporate dairy.
This brings me to what i hope will be the point. On the outside of the cardboard boxes inhabited by milk, there is printed a concise description of the contents, i.e. type of milk, expiration date, etc. As a result of the brand name, the abbreviation on the boxes reads something like this: "LOL SKIM 02/19/04." My mind sees this and knows it means "Land O' Lakes," but my better instincts cannot help suspecting there is something funny about this milk. I can just picture the Instant Messenger conversation between purchaser and wholesaler now:
xMiLkMaNx172: hey
cafeteria_cutie19: hey mlkmn! ;D
xMiLkMaNx172: whats up?
cafeteria_cutie19: nm, u?
xMiLkMaNx172: nm
cafeteria_cutie19: hey, what kind of mlk ru delivering 2day?
xMiLkMaNx172: LOL 1%!
cafeteria_cutie19: LOL! mlkmn, ur teh greatest! ^_^
xMiLkMaNx172: i no
xMiLkMaNx172 cya l8r
cafeteria_cutie19: bi-bi!
Yes, something is definitely going on between those two. But we're not going to get into that. Just remember this: Next time you laugh and milk comes out of your nose, you might not be the only one laughing. MOOWA HAHAHAHA!!!
(Today's title brought to you by "O Brother, Where Art Thou?")
I have a confession to make. Among other tasks, i work as a milk boy in our school cafeteria. It is a shameful career, and my elderly Chinese martial arts mentor is no longer talking to me because of it. I cannot say i blame him. Anyway, the milk we use is brought to you by Land O' Lakes, a brand name that evokes, paradoxically, a land which is made of lakes. To further the unbelievability of the name, one would almost have to presume that these lakes are filled with milk; otherwise, why even bring them up? Land O' Cows would be a more fitting name, but they never asked me. And even if they did, i would never sell out my brilliant ideas to corporate dairy.
This brings me to what i hope will be the point. On the outside of the cardboard boxes inhabited by milk, there is printed a concise description of the contents, i.e. type of milk, expiration date, etc. As a result of the brand name, the abbreviation on the boxes reads something like this: "LOL SKIM 02/19/04." My mind sees this and knows it means "Land O' Lakes," but my better instincts cannot help suspecting there is something funny about this milk. I can just picture the Instant Messenger conversation between purchaser and wholesaler now:
xMiLkMaNx172: hey
cafeteria_cutie19: hey mlkmn! ;D
xMiLkMaNx172: whats up?
cafeteria_cutie19: nm, u?
xMiLkMaNx172: nm
cafeteria_cutie19: hey, what kind of mlk ru delivering 2day?
xMiLkMaNx172: LOL 1%!
cafeteria_cutie19: LOL! mlkmn, ur teh greatest! ^_^
xMiLkMaNx172: i no
xMiLkMaNx172 cya l8r
cafeteria_cutie19: bi-bi!
Yes, something is definitely going on between those two. But we're not going to get into that. Just remember this: Next time you laugh and milk comes out of your nose, you might not be the only one laughing. MOOWA HAHAHAHA!!!
(Today's title brought to you by "O Brother, Where Art Thou?")
